In recent years, Hong Kong has witnessed a significant increase in the phenomenon known as “silver divorce” – dissolution of marriages among older couples. This rising trend reflects the shifting dynamics of marriage, as well as the evolving social, economic, and cultural factors that influence relationships in the city. Today we talk with Kajal Aswani – Partner at Hugill & Ip – about the reasons behind the surge in silver divorces in Hong Kong, the impact it has on individuals and society, and the support systems in place to assist those going through this life-altering experience.
How are the dynamics of marriage changing in a society like Hong Kong?
Traditionally, marriage was considered a lifelong commitment in Hong Kong, with the concept of divorce known to be a taboo, especially amongst older couples who had been together for decades. However, with the changing attitudes and societal norms, the idea of staying in an unhappy marriage for the sake of appearances or fear of being alone is no longer as prevalent. Divorce rates have grown exponentially in the past two or three decades, making Hong Kong one of the divorce capitals of the world. Older couples are now exercising their right to exit a marriage that no longer serves their best interests. This can be attributed to several factors, including increased life expectancy, changing gender roles, financial independence, and cultural shifts. The Covid-19 pandemic has also changed the mindset of many who are seeking a newfound appreciation for life and a conscious choice for happiness, attributing to the increase in silver divorces, where the pursuit of happiness and fulfilment is now taking precedence over financial security or companionship.
What are the most common reasons for older couples filing for divorce?
When individuals in their 50s, 60s or beyond find themselves in unhappy marriages, they may experience what is known as the “empty nest syndrome”. This refers to a period of transition when children have left the home, leaving the couple with a sense of emptiness and a lack of shared purpose. This newfound freedom often prompt individuals to reassess their relationships and consider separation.
One factor contributing to this trend is financial stability. Many older adults in Hong Kong are financially independent, allowing them to make decisions without the financial constraints that may have influenced their earlier decisions to stay in unhappy marriages.
Increased life expectancy also plays as an important factor. Longer lifespans mean that individuals are spending more years in retirement. As a result, they are seeking fulfilment and happiness in their relationships, rather than staying in unhappy marriages for the sake of traditional or societal expectations.
Also, gender roles have dramatically changed in the past three decades. Women empowerment in society plays a significant role in the rise of silver divorces. With increased education and career opportunities, women are no longer solely dependent on their spouses for financial security, giving them the freedom to pursue their own happiness. Women are more confident about what makes them satisfied and generally feel less pressured by the societal norms.
What impact can silver divorces have on individuals and society?
Silver divorces can have both positive and negative impacts on individuals and society. On one hand, divorcing later in life can provide individuals with the opportunity to seek happiness and fulfilment in their later years. Many people may feel that they have grown apart from their partners over the years and may find happiness and companionship elsewhere. In some cases, it can lead to personal growth, increased self-esteem, and improved mental health as individuals are able to rediscover themselves and pursue their own interests and passions. However, in other cases, it can bring feelings of loneliness, depression and isolation, particularly for those who may not have a strong support system in place. On a broader scale, it can also lead to increased strain on social services and support systems as the aging population continues to grow in Hong Kong.
Recognizing the need to support individuals going through divorce at a later stage of their lives, various resources and support systems have been established in Hong Kong. These include counselling services, support groups, legal and financial planning advice. These resources aim to provide emotional, legal, and financial support to individuals navigating through the complexities of divorce later in life.
By providing necessary resources and fostering a more supportive environment, Hong Kong can ensure that individuals going through an emotionally difficult time can rebuild their lives with dignity and find happiness in their later years.
What are generally the main financial considerations impacting older divorcing couples?
First and foremost, individuals ought to consider their assets, in particular retirement accounts. Dividing the matrimonial assets and other retirement funds can have significant implications on long-term financial stability. This is also in the case where there are assets/benefits which the other spouse depends on, for example specific insurance plans.
Debts and liabilities also need to be considered, e.g. outstanding mortgages and loans or other financial obligations that spouses might have during the marriage. Another main consideration might be healthcare and long-term care needs. This may involve evaluating health insurance coverage and considering costs of long-term care and planning for medical expenses in retirement.
Are there any recent Family Court decisions relating to silver divorces in Hong Kong?
In the case of LOTM and CSM [2022] HKFC 64 involving an older couple (elderly couple over 60 years) in a long marriage (i.e. almost 20 years), the wife received a steady government pension to cater for her future needs including accommodation. The husband, however, inherited a property 4 years before the parties’ separation and the Court considered it to be his property for use as his home in future. The Judge decided that all assets should be shared equally and because neither party had sufficient assets to buy out each other’s share in the matrimonial home, the Judge ordered the sale of the home with the proceeds of the sale of 51% to the wife and 49% to the husband.
In the more recent case of LSL v WYF [2023] HKFC 76, the Judge was faced with a similar situation where the parties were married for 30 years with one child (adult and self-sufficient by the time the proceedings were brought in Court). They were both in their early 60s. The Wife, however, never worked during her marriage. She was seeking maintenance from the husband until the age of 88. The husband was an engineer earning around HK$150,000 a month. He was due to retire at 65. The asset pool was HK$16.9 million. In determining the wife’s claims, the Court considered that the total assets in the matrimonial pot was unable to satisfy the wife’s future needs up to 88. And apart from considering her needs, the Court had to consider the husband’s age and his needs too and considered it unfair to impose a duty on the husband to pay the wife beyond his retirement age. Therefore, the Court ordered that the wife should retain one property (to cater for her housing needs) and the husband to pay her a lump sum. The distribution meant the wife got about 60.6% of the matrimonial pot and they were able to have a clean break.
What other considerations are important?
It is crucial to update existing Wills and other estate planning tools to reflect the changes in the circumstances after divorce, no matter what the age of the separating spouses might be. This includes revising beneficiary designations, executor appointments, and any provisions related to the ex-spouse. Failing to update these documents may result in unintended consequences and assets being dealt with and distributed contrary to one’s wishes.
It is also important to review and update documents such as Enduring Powers of Attorney (“EPOA”). An EPOA grants someone the authority to make financial and legal decisions on behalf of an individual if they become mentally incapacitated. If the ex-spouse was previously the designated attorney, it is essential to appoint someone else to fulfil that role. Also, if there is an Advance Medical Directive, this will have to be revisited. This document specifies an individual’s wish regarding medical treatment and healthcare decision if an individual is unable to make such decisions.
Moreover, divorcing spouses should also review and update beneficiary designations on life insurance policies and retirement accounts. Divorce may affect the ex-spouse’s entitlement to these assets, so it is crucial to ensure that beneficiary designations align with one’s current wishes. In many cases, these get updated to include children of the family at certain age, even if divorce may not be on the horizon.
What advice would you give to elderly couples after the divorce process has ended?
The end of a marriage is a significant life event that can bring about a whirlwind of emotions and challenges. It is important to recognise that healing from a divorce takes time, and it is crucial to give yourself the space and patience needed to process your emotions and move forward in a healthy way.
It is crucial to seek support from family, friends, or a therapist who can provide guidance and understanding during this difficult time. It is also important to prioritize self-care and take steps to nurture physical and emotional well-being. Building new networks and exploring opportunities for personal growth can have a positive effect on mental well-being and help individuals to turn the page after divorce.
Ultimately, everyone’s journey is unique, and it is important to prioritize your own well-being and healing process. Giving yourself the time and space to heal properly can set the foundation for a healthier and brighter future.
The article was originally published on Asia Law Portal
